Sex After Having a Baby

Will sex hurt after childbirth? When is it safe to have sex again after having my baby? I’m worried I won’t feel like having sex ever again! The Bay City Doulas team is asked these questions often. Yup, these are common questions, and you are not alone! Today we want to dive into the topic of having sex after childbirth and talk about how your sex life may change, get restored, or even get better after having a baby. Today we are talking about sex after having a baby.

The initial postpartum period

Many providers recommend waiting for the first four to six weeks after having a baby to have sex, no matter how you delivered your baby. In the first two weeks after childbirth, the risk of complications is highest, and your body needs time to heal from childbirth. Sex is most likely the last thing on your mind during this time, which is entirely normal. During this initial postpartum period, it is normal to experience vaginal soreness, night sweets, and your breasts to feel heavy and soar. Not to mention the exhaustion which takes place after bringing your beautiful baby home. Take a breath, explain to your partner how you feel and what’s going on, and don’t worry about the pause in your sex life! You just did something amazing you birthed a completely new human being!!! 

Am I ready to have sex?

After the initial four to six weeks, many postpartum women start feeling better, and slowly, a routine starts to occur in the homes of new parents. This may be the time where the thought of having sex again starts to begin more appealing. If that’s not your truth, that’s completely fine too; you will feel more comfortable in your new normal soon.

Will sex hurt?

It’s not uncommon that the first time you have sex after childbirth is uncomfortable or straight-out painful. Sometimes trauma from birth or scars can make everything feel tighter and more sensitive. Estrogen levels drop lower right after childbirth and stay down until two to three months postpartum. If you breastfeed, this dop can last even longer. This may cause vaginal dryness, and your vaginal tissue can shrink and become thinner, leading to pain during sex. Talk to your provider and ask for estrogen cream, which can be very helpful. We also recommend visiting a pelvic floor therapist to ensure your pelvic floor is doing ok. A pelvic floor specialist may give you some exercises to practice at home, which can help your pelvic floor recover from childbirth and help you with your sex life.

Enjoying sex after childbirth

Many women enjoy sex more after birth. Birth can make us more sensitive to what’s going on with our body and sometimes even shift some internal things around and put them in the right place, making us more susceptible to stimulation. Many women report that they feel more comfortable with their bodies and experience stronger orgasms than before childbirth.

Remember to be kind to yourself

Many women are also not ready to have sex for many months after childbirth! That’s completely fine, and believe us, you are not alone!!! We encourage you to talk to your partner and let them know how you are feeling. Remember, typically your sex drive will return. This is your own individualized journey; remember to be patient with yourself and your partner during this time.

Thank you for reading this week’s blog, “sex after having a baby.” For more helpful tips on all things pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and parenthood, please check out our weekly blog.