My Battle with Endometriosis

I still remember the first time I had endometriosis symptoms, although it would be years until I knew what was going on with my body. I was at a friend’s house and got uncontrollably nauseous for no reason at all, my body began to shake, and I felt light-headed. We thought I had food poisoning. Little did I know that this was a feeling I would learn to live with for years and years to come. This week I am here to share my battle with endometriosis. A struggle that affects between two and ten percent of women worldwide.

What is endometriosis

Endometriosis is a disorder in which the endometrium lining grows outside the uterus and sheds. Endometrial shedding can cause infertility, pain during different points of a menstrual cycle, pain during sex, a heavy flow, nausea, and much more. The cause for endometriosis is unknown, and while a surgeon may perform laparoscopic surgery to remove endometrial tissue, there is no lasting cure known.

The beginning of my story

Throughout my teenage years, I dealt with varying symptoms. These included irregular periods, pain during ovulation and my period, nausea, fatigue, and sometimes even vomiting. For the first three years, these were all manageable. I thought, maybe this is just what being a woman is? Once I hit the age of seventeen, these symptoms became unbearable. I started to have what I have always referred to as “episodes.” These episodes would come out of nowhere and debilitate me completely. Suddenly, I would have the sharpest pain in my uterus and feel like something had stabbed me; if I moved at all in any direction, the pain would worsen. I would vomit, cry, shake, turn white, and stay completely still during these episodes. Each time I would end up at urgent care, where they would give me different pain killers to stop the pain and turn me away back home.

My diagnosis

Up until recently, the only way to truly diagnose endometriosis was through laparoscopic surgery. For insurance to approve and a doctor to perform a laparoscopy, there needed to be years of evidence with all signs pointing to endometriosis. I had a family friend who had endometriosis all of her life, she helped immensely with my diagnosis. My surgery at nineteen confirmed that I had been living with endometriosis.

Life after surgery

Life after my laparoscopic surgery was 75% better. I felt like I got my life back and didn’t have to live in pain constantly. For the first two years after, my symptoms were nonexistent, and although the endometriosis has returned over time, it’s nowhere close to as unbearable as it once was. At this point, I have 1-2 days a month where I am at about 50%. I don’t live in fear of pain, and I can successfully work and run my business.

The hardest part about my journey

The hardest part about living with an invisible medical condition is that people don’t see it—you can feel very in the dark. I have struggled over the years with how much or how little to tell the people around me about how I am feeling. As humans, we need and desire to “fix” things. This can be highly frustrating when you live with a chronic medical condition! The truth is that I have accepted that this is a condition I will be living with for many more years; I don’t need someone to try and fix me.

I have found positives in this, and also, there are times where it’s still incredibly frustrating. Anybody who lives with a chronic condition knows just how many pieces of unsolicited advice come in. (PSA: they don’t help.) Yes, I’ve gone gluten-free. Yes, I’ve had surgery and will probably have more. Yup, I know having kids can cure it or suppress the symptoms. No, I do not want any more of your advice.

Why I am writing this today

Today, I shared my struggles with endometriosis and a vulnerable story about my life. The truth is, we all have unknown journeys and struggles. We see judgment without a background in every aspect of life. We see this in parenthood more than anywhere else. This is a reminder that we never know what someone else is going through, what they have been through, or what they are capable of! Life can be challenging, and unexpected things can and will happen. I genuinely believe that if parents were encouraged to share more of the vulnerable sides of their journeys, especially in the first years, we would all feel a little less in the dark. I invite you to come out of the darkness and share your vulnerable stories, weaknesses, and dark places too!

Thank you for reading this weeks’ blog, “My battle with endometriosis.” For more information on all things pregnancy, postpartum, parenthood, and life check out our other weekly blogs.